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Come Away With Me, 9:32 PM, Tuesday, June 16, 2009
70 days. 14 weeks. 3 different stages of a relationship. Seasons of a Semester.
How should I start this? I should probably start by introducing myself, shouldn’t I? Nah. I won’t. I mean, with all the crazy people all around these days. Anyway, the story starts some time ago….
It all started with a ‘+’. I’ve heard of many situations that started because of weird things, but not a ‘+’. Who knew that one little ‘+’ would lead to a question, which would also lead to a ‘life changing’ situation…
“Okay class, you need to pair up for this activity, then come and write the pairs on the board. If you dowan to write your pair also nevermind. You just don’t get your participation marks. Not my problem.” After Miss See spoke, the class groaned but dutifully got into pairs. One of these pairs were Karmun and Natalie. “I’ll go and write.” Natalie just nodded as she tried to keep herself awake. 8.00 classes weren’t her forte. She then yawned, stretching her arms and looking round the classroom before watching her classmates writing down their pairs. It was then that she saw it. The ‘+’. After Karmun resettled into her seat, Natalie asked: “Why did you write a ‘+’ when everyone else wrote ‘&’? You see, ‘Man Yee & Lily’, ‘Raymond & Ling’… Why we have to be ‘+’?” She then reached down to pick up her bottle, before uncorking it and taking a gulp of water, all the while watching Karmun via peripheral vision. Karmun grinned before saying: “That’s because we’re married.” It was lucky that no one was sitting in the seat in front of Natalie. Cause it got a bit wet from the spray. Karmun just laughed before focusing her attention on their lecturer, who had just put up a Powerpoint slide containing some questions regarding statistics. Natalie remained stunned for the remainder of the lecture. She thought she saw some cows flying past the window. Pink flying cows with brown spots and green wings. Flying past a window at a classroom that was underground. It was going to be a weird day… <‘DREAM’ SEQUENCE END>
“We’re married.” I remember staring blankly at the both of them, trying to decipher their faces. My sides were also threatening to burst as I tried to push down my laughter and keep up the serious façade. “Why wasn’t I invited?” I asked in a hurt tone. Karmun paused slightly before answering, gathering her words. “Umm… It was done in a hurry really. In the heat of the moment?” she looked questioningly at Natalie, who was still slightly shocked, complete with slightly wide eyes and bizarre facial expression. “Hmm… This got me thinking. No guests? Then who officiated it?” I asked, amused. They exchanged a look. “Miss See.” They both deadpanned, while I burst out in fits of laughter. “Miss-miss See?” I asked, wiping tears of laughter from my eyes. “A statistics lecturer officiated your marriage?” I couldn’t help it. I laughed some more, before being silenced by a death glare. “Okay… Stopping now.” I safely waited till Karmun departed for her next class before laughing again. By this time, the people on the bench were looking at me like some sort of retard. In my defense, I wasn’t the only one who thought it was amusing. Facebook-ing friends were lapping up the news faster than a dog laps water. Most were laughing, some were teasing… But Dalvin took the cake. ‘Umm… Congratulations on your…Unholy matrimony.’ One word. Win. The next day I trudged sleepily into the corridor before being passed by a gust of air, followed by a mad laugh that effectively jolted me awake. It also helped that there was this simply disgusting pong… “Joshua! Do you know how gross that is? My God!” Joshua’s girlfriend, Kim yelled from behind me. Joshua responded by flipping his head back model style and sticking out his tongue. “Hi Joshua. Hi Kim.” There was no way I’d be able to catch any shut-eye with that smell around. I decided to read the papers instead. I sat at the bench in front of LS8, before being interrupted by a… “GOOD MORNIN’!!” Vivian shouted as she suddenly emerged in front of me, carrying some manila cards and Styrofoam letters. She placed her stuff down before pulling out a staple gun, which she playfully fired in my direction, shooting some staples at me. Joshua was doing some awful pose on the orange chairs across me, with his legs crossed and chin jutted out with a facial expression that mimicked Jackie Chan in ‘City Hunter’. The thought of it still gives me nightmares. Kim was messaging on her phone as Joshua continued to pose in front of her. It was then Vivian turned and said “Oh my God, you sure you’re a guy ah? What kind of man are you?” She examined his look critically, gesturing with her hands to prove her point. She then sat right next to him and proceeded to do the same thing. The pot calling the kettle black. At least she didn’t look as bad. Kim promptly stood, shaking her head Bollywood style, before rolling her eyes and saying : “Whatever. We’re supposed to do the board la…” Joshua and Vivian remained seated, trying to outdo each other while Kim picked up the manila card and the staple gun, turned up her nose at Joshua’s direction, and begun to walk down the corridor. “Don’t like that la…” Joshua immediately abandoned his earlier position and sheepishly smiled while chasing after Kim. Vivian remained posing, stopping only after Ms Selina passed her, shaking her head and grinning. Vivian paused, giggled and called down the corridor, “Morning Ms Selina!” to which a “Morning.” was called back in response. She then looked at me, did a small laugh, then suddenly glared, before laughing again, then, picking up the Styrofoam letters, she skipped down the corridor to where Joshua and Kim were busily stapling the card unto the board. Later that day, I rushed past the board to my Human Comm class, as something caught my eye. I retraced my steps, stopping directly in front of the board. ‘Love Lockdown’ had been spelled out on the board, with 2 giant locks coming together to form a heart. It was at that exact moment that Mr Murali walked past me. I immediately turned and sped down the corridor towards LH 8, all the while thinking, ‘If it’s supposed to be a lockdown, why were the 2 locks open?’
That above is our story. Written by your one and only Rachel Yao! So if you guys have any comments please fill free to leave one at my cbox or Facebook or my e-mail. Thanks. So stay tune for more funny stories to come. :)